Sunday, September 18, 2011

Who wears short shorts?

As I say often, I travel alone quite a bit and I enjoy it.  What I don't enjoy however, is dining alone when I'm traveling.  I was in Barcelona last summer and ended up meeting a lot of wonderful people.  Unfortunately, I also had probably the worst experience meeting someone online.  I was figuring out dinner one night when this British guy messaged and asked to hang out.  So I thought why not since eating alone meant McDonald's while with some company, I could have a proper meal.

He told me he was coming from the beach and I thought that was strange.  At least have the courtesy to go back to your hotel and shower right?  As I waited in front of a Zara, I saw this dude walking towards me in the tiniest swim shorts and I thought please don't let that be him.  Of course this moron looked nothing like his online picture. The online picture of him also didn't have "pompous bitch" written on his forehead.  Don't get me wrong, short swimwear on a guy is pretty sexy...but not if your skin is transparent and you barely tip the scale at 100 lbs.  

Awkwardly we had to go pick a place to eat.  He didn't offer any suggestions but only complained every time I suggested one on Las Ramblas.  I was aware that restaurants in touristy areas were a rip off but I didn't care at this point because I was so hungry.   Throughout dinner, this moron insulted my ethnic background and told me how he disliked Canadians. Then when my bill came, he yelled at me "See I told you not to eat here!" because my glass of coke turned out to be like $8 Cdn or something.  I thought, why the hell do you care, you're not even paying for me.  I have never eaten so fast in my life. As we exited the restaurant, he asked what else we were doing.  I said, "I'm going home, you can do whatever the hell you want."  I literally turned and ran down to the subway.  As I was turning, I could see that he had held his hand out to shake mine. In my mind I thought, shove that bitchy hand back into your booty shorts and go back to London!

1 comment:

  1. i couldn't stop laughing after read this story! hahahaha

    Briii Safadinho!